Were I smarter, I would be working on book reviews that are due May 21. There are four of them, four page a piece.

They are due on the same day as a twelve page takehome exam for that class. That's two days after an in-class exam. That exam is three days after another twelve page take-home is due. Three days before that, a fifteen to twenty-five page research paper. Five days before that, another fifteen to twenty-five page research paper.

i>Shit bitch, you are the fucked.

But I'm not working on it. I'm rationalizing my procrastination by assuring myself that I can complete the four reviews and the takehome in two nights. Of course, I can, but do I want to?

Maybe I do. Maybe I function best under extreme amounts of pressure. I don't function much at all without it.

Anxiety is slightly painful, it's destructive, but it's also a bit of a rush. It's addictive. I don't think I really can function anymore without feeling the axe above my head.

I need to feel the fear before I can work.

Good thing my (hopeful) future job involves a lot of deadlines.

~Halcyondream~

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